So over the past couple of days I’ve had the idea of doing a blog post about how my Mum is a rather inspirational person because she is just so damn positive! She doesn’t worry about things the way other people do. I was thinking today that maybe it’s because once you’ve lived 50+ (although she doesn’t look a day over 21!) years, small things don’t stress you out the same. Or maybe when you’ve lived through some pretty horrible shit, nothing will ever be as bad! Basically her carefree (but definitely not careless) attitude has been a blessing lately, there are quite a few people who think I’m CRAZY to be doing what I’m doing right now, my Mother, however thinks they are the crazy ones. As she said, ‘why are they so negative?’
You see I’m in an odd position, I thought I had to quit my current job in order to be allowed to take holidays in December (being retail it’s a big no no), so I handed in my resignation. However, my boss didn’t really want me to leave so said I could have this time as holiday….but he didn’t really want me to return just to quit again after a couple of weeks. I understand his point of view. He left it completely up to me; they were more than happy for me to stay but didn’t think I should if I wasn’t entirely happy in the job. And, to be honest, I wasn’t entirely happy, it just felt different to a year earlier and I was thinking ‘why not have a change after 12 months in this job?’ But then, on the other hand, I love all the friends I’ve made at work and sometimes I have a great time, not because of the job, but because of my peeps. And it’s a bookstore! Who doesn’t like books? And reading them for free or extra cheap? And talking about them? And attending events where I pretend I’m super literary and know who all the authors and publishers are, but really, I’m just circling the buffet and making sure my wine glass is always full. There are always good and bad things about any job and I’m not good at making adult decisions….so I just buried my head in the sand and avoided thinking about it. Until my boss put me on the spot and asked for a decision. So I said I was definitely leaving. Eek! I hadn’t actually made that decision in my mind; it was just an instinctive answer. I was offered another job in the meantime, although I don’t think it’s happening anymore (that’s a whole other story!) but still avoided the situation. Whenever anyone at work asked me if I was leaving I just said I didn’t want to talk about it…very mature. They continued to try and convince me to stay but I just didn’t deal with it. Why? Because of what started it all…..my trip to New York! My Mum bought me a ticket and the plan was set. All 4 Dowdeswell girls would meet in New York from their current homes (Australia, England and America) on the 22nd of December to have Christmas and New Year’s together for the first time in 2 years. Yay!!
So that is how I ended up in a position where I had my ‘last’ day at work today so that I could fly to New York tomorrow and then I would return in 2 weeks not really knowing if I had a job or not. Yep going to spend money in New York and then return to London unemployed! That is why some people thought I was crazy.
My Mum? Thought it was fantastic. There are only positives in this situation. The flight and accommodation have been paid for. And I get to spend Christmas with my family. In New York!
I can deal with the job and all that when I get back. And those sorts of things do have a way of sorting themselves out. If you remain positive!
My Mum is inspirational and if I’m freaking out her calm words remind me that nothing is ever that bad and everything will be ok. There is always a lot to be positive about. J
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